Feel the fear and do it anyway - Susan Jeffers

Truths about fear:

1.The fear will never go away as long as I continue to grow.

2.The only way to get rid of the fear of doing something is to go out and do it.

3.The only way to feel better about myself is to go out..and do it (not the other way around).

4.Not only am I going to experience fear whenever I'm on unfamiliar territory, but so is everyone else.

5. Pushing through fear is less frightening than living with the underlying fear that comes from a feeling of helplessness.

Another part of the WHEN/THEN game I used to play had to do with self esteem. ''When I feel better about myself...then I'll do it.'' This is another mix-up in the order of reality. The only way to feel better about oneself is to go out...and do it. The ''doing it'' comes before the feeling better about yourself (and not the other way around!). I was totally ''independent''. I was still expecting the men in my life to ''make me happy.'' I finally learned there is really only one person in the world who can make me happy, and that is ME! Ironically, only through this realization was I able, for the first time, to have a wonderfully nurturing relationship. One clue that you are truly taking responsibility is when you feel little or no anger toward this person. You realize that that you chose to be there in the past and you are now choosing to leave. "Even death is not to be feared by one who has lived wisely...." "The whole secret of existence is to have no fear. Never fear what will..." “No one saves us but ourselves. No one can and no one may. We ourselves must walk the path.” Buddha All the misery on the planet arises due to a personalized sense of "me" or "us." That covers up the essence of who you are. When you are unaware of that inner essence, in the end you always create misery. It's as simple as that. When you don't know who you are, you create a mind-made self as a substitute for your beautiful divine being and cling to that fearful and needy self. Tolle, Power of now